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Pick at the pops: 24 September 2007

Jamelia and Gabrielle

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Our weekly round-up of the weird and wonderful world of pop music...

It’s been a sad week for pop music. Nothing particularly tragic has happened - apart from the ongoing Britney melodrama, obviously - but the stars have been falling over themselves to point out the troubling stuff you might otherwise miss.

Take r’n’b goddess and record contract tightrope-walker Jamelia, who has hit back at remarks made about the MOBO awards by Britsoul stalwart Gabrielle. Long Gab Silver pointed out that the awards lacked a soul category and lamented the dominance of US acts – fair points, you might think. Apparently not: “I find it sad and remarkable that people are always looking for negatives for negatives’ sake, when MOBO have just pulled off one of their best shows ever,” raged MOBOs host Jamelia, collecting her cheque for the evening’s work from MOBO.

And here’s Girls Aloud wallflower Cheryl Cole: “It’s sad that people have to say these things to get a little bit of publicity off the back of us.” Who’s she referring to? Jamelia? Charlotte Church (as usual)? Gordon Brown? No, it’s veteran pop-rapper and songwriter Betty Boo (aka Alison Clarkson), who it seems is mistaken in thinking she’s been asked to write some ditties for Cole’s forthcoming solo career because it was never actually happening and Girls Aloud are staying together, thank you very much. Have a heart, Chezza – the Boo-ster’s now out of a job. Again.

Another toffee-nosed young pop star trying to distance himself from what the rest of the world believes is Gerard Way of emo-rockers My Chemical Romance. Oops, sorry Gez. He says here that emo is “f*cking garbage” and “there are no similarities” between his band’s music and the aforementioned moany scene. Well, that’s the hand that feeds truly bitten.

Finally, you will all have seen the photos of Stereophonics’ pocket singer Kelly Jones waving his gashed arm around like a hero and not, in fact, like a chap who has injured himself getting chucked out of a nightclub for trying to sneak into the ladies’ loos. Anyway, surgeons reportedly saved the miniature maestro’s career just in time: “I might not have been able to pick up a guitar again,” choked Kelly. Sad.

Matthew Horton

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